Tag Archives: spiritual being

When Love Doesn’t Meet Your Expectations

I have come to understand that the Universe is full of love. But it took decades to come to this realization.  Growing up in a dysfunctional family the truth about love and abundance was obscured.  Now I see that love is abundant – without limits.  I don’t have to do anything except be in the present moment to receive the love all around me.  If I am surrounded by busi-ness and distraction it makes it harder for me to feel love.  Love isn’t ever not there, it’s simply me that sometimes isn’t able to access it.  Love is after all our essence as Spiritual beings created by Divine Spirit.

Yesterday I experienced a familiar feeling of lack of love.  For many years, I’ve wanted to feel loved by my sister. I’ve have the expectation of having a close relationship with her.  I wanted us to share time with each other and grow through life together.  Coming from a dysfunctional family, that’s simply not how our relationship has manifested.  I wanted my sister to fit my expectations and give me what I thought I needed. But she hasn’t.  And sometimes that doesn’t feel okay to me. 

Sometimes I feel sorry for myself for not being acknowledged by her.  Yesterday was one of those days when I felt, what’s wrong with me?  What did I do to her to make her dislike me so much?  What can I do to “make” her love me?  Those thoughts led to, “I’m not okay because I don’t have the type of relationship with my sister that I wanted.”  And then I felt anger and frustration.

I stewed for a couple hours.  I retired for the day and crawled into my warm soft bed with my two Westies, Lucky and Gracie.  Lucky gives affection on his terms so I’m delighted whenever he doles out kisses or lays close to me.  Last night, he curled up in my lap and stayed there.  It was a delightful surprise. 

Then I “woke up”  and became present.  Here I was, surrounded by love from my dogs and my partner. What was I lacking?  I was lacking nothing.  Yet, if I had remained in my negative feelings and didn’t become present I could have missed this experience.  

The message for me is don’t look at what form love comes in. 

Look at the presence of love in your life.  It is abundant.  Realize that getting love from a friend, pet, or a stranger is no different from feeling love from a spouse or child. Love doesn’t come in degrees. We sometimes discount the love that’s surrounding us if we’re not receiving the love from that “special” person. 

When you feel disappointed in not getting what you expect from a person, the way to get out of that feeling is to see that it’s your Ego voice telling you that you need a certain person’s love to be okay.  It’s not true.  The truth is that love is always available – sometimes in surprise packages. 

“Be Still and Know”  can also mean “Be Still and Know that Love Is.”

Uncovering Blocks to Abundance and Transforming, Part 2


Abundance emanates from energy flow.  You exchange energy through giving and receiving.  If you’re blocked by limiting mind paradigms, most of which are created unwittingly in your childhood, you aren’t able to give and receive fully.  It’s your birthright as a Spiritual Being to have all you need.  No one is better or less than you are.  No one deserves more or less than you do.  The universe supplies more than enough if you remove your limiting beliefs about what you “deserve.”

Mind paradigms that block you are like tapes you play in your head from your childhood…from what you heard your parents or mentors sa.   These tapes unconsciously act on you.  Things like:  there’s only so much; get it while you can;  life is hard;  I don’t deserve it;  I don’t have enough; and I won’t have enough.

Mind paradigms that free you to soak in abundance: 

1-  I am connected to everyone and everything in the Universe and beyond and all my needs are taken care of.

 2- I now receive abundance which flows from the Divine Source.

 3- All that I need comes easily to me now.

 4- I am open to giving and receiving abundantly.

 5- The Universe provides more than I need.

Changing the way you think and re-programming your old tapes is the key to changing your life.  Recalibrate the way you relate to the world and shine the light on old thought patterns.  Find out what’s at the root of these thought patterns for a lasting paradigm shift. 

You may experience an “ah-hah” moment when you dig down into your unconscious thoughts and see what’s been driving you.  Uncover these beliefs, accept that you didn’t know better, and then replace with the Truth.

For example, if you believe there’s only so much that can go around, it may be because you were taught not to trust in the abundance of the universe and you were never told that you are a Spiritual Being whose birthright is abundance.   

Use your affirmations daily and get curious about any resistance you have believing them.  Repeating positive affirmations along with honest introspection will enable you to begin to open your energy to abundance.  Enjoy it, it’s yours!

Uncovering Blocks to Abundance in Your Life, Part 1

Abundance is expressed in many forms.  Money, a loving family, supportive friends, doting pets, and a vibrant garden are all manifestations of abundance. It’s my experience that creating abundance takes more than simply repeating a mantra such as “I will make one million dollars this year.” 

Creating abundance starts with getting curious about the paradigms you unconsciously created when you were a child.  These paradigms imprinted  ideas about your worthiness to be abundant.  I use the phrase “the limiter” to characterize the imprints from childhood which today act like a straight-jacket preventing you from living a full and abundant life. For example, if you observed your mother anxious and gruff with you when she was writing checks, you may carry that anxiety to your own bill-paying.  If you heard your father say “we never have enough” your limiter may tell you “I never have enough.”  And most importantly, if your parents weren’t capable of giving you the love and support you needed as a child, you may be faced with a sense of inadequacy and feeling like your productivity in the world is not worth what it’s really worth.  Your limiter will tell you that you really don’t deserve so much.

Most of us weren’t raised with the idea that we are entitled to all the abundance the universe offers by our very nature as a Spiritual Being. 

The good news is that you can change your imprints. 

Next time,  more about uncovering ways which you block abundance in your life.